There comes a moment in the life of every chicken owner when a crossroads is reached. In this moment you must answer a question, and so set a trajectory in which lies the future of all your poultry-related endeavors. The question is this:
Are your chickens farm animals or pets?
I will give you our answer in the form of a quiz.
One day, a peregrine falcon discovers a new protein source in our backyard. He does his amazing diving-thing and soon has a mouthful of feathers. The chicken is too big for him to pick up, but he digs his talons in until a neighbor alerts my husband and he comes running. The falcon retreats to the porch roof, the chicken runs under the playhouse and the children run wild. The chicken (once coaxed out of hiding) is discovered to be severely wounded with several gaping, bloody gashes.
Now the quiz. Do we…
1) Ignore the chicken, hope for the best and go out for curry.
2) Decide sadly that the chicken is too far gone to save, and make it into chicken curry (not in front of the children)
3) Run the chicken into the kitchen as if we were poultry paramedics, shouting things like “get the hydrogen peroxide!” and “where’s the sewing kit?”, and then proceed to spend TWO HOURS giving the chicken TWENTY-FIVE stitches, with breaks in which we hand-feed the chicken raisins. Complete our task by applying liquid band-aid to all the suture spots, with a grand finale of blowing on the chicken’s rear-end for five minutes in order to dry the liquid band-aid goo.
I’m still a little winded.